Community Corner

Moms Talk: When's the Right Time to Dial-In for a Cell Phone?

This week, the Ballwin-Ellisville Patch Mom's Council discusses the ups and downs of those handheld devices used for music, games and sometimes even phone calls.

To say that communication technology has changed in the last few years may be one of the biggest understatements published on the Web. Over the course of roughly 10 years, cell phones alone have gone from devices limited to talking, storing numbers and viewing a digital clock to becoming handheld computers that would've made Captain Kirk jealous.

With so many features and possible reasons to justify them, where should families draw the line when deciding whether to invest in a phone for your son or daughter? This week, the Ballwin-Ellisville Patch Moms Council helps us find out:

 

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Shireen's Take: (Shireen Kinzy is a Ballwin resident, and the mother of two children, ages 8 and 10.)

"All of my friends have their own phones, Mom!" my ten year-old daughter whines.

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I didn't believe her at first, so I asked her friends' moms. Sure enough, most of her close friends had talked their parents into buying them cell phones. To that end, it seems our family is in the minority.

I wondered if I was missing something – a reason why 10-year-olds would need them. I asked the other mothers when and how their girls used their phones, only to find, perhaps not so surprisingly, that they call and text-message each other after school and evenings from home.

Hmmm. When my daughter is at home, she uses our landline phone and home computer to chat with her friends. At that time of day, I’m usually so busy that she has dibs on the phone and computer anyway. Because of that, I really can't justify paying for her to have her own.

So when does she actually need her own phone? Right now, all of the after school activities and events are chaperoned by adults. If she ever needs to reach me, she can and has used their's. I could see in the future, maybe when she’s going out without adult supervision (gasp!), that I would want her to be able to reach me. I also know that she’ll be talking and texting a lot more often as a teenager.

The time will come when one phone in the house won't be enough, and I know she hates to hear this, but as I told my daughter, "We'll see when the time is right."

 

Cam's Take (Cam Compton has been a resident of Ellisville for more than 35 years. She is the mother of two daughters, ages 16 and 28, and is raising a 9 year-old granddaughter.)

For many years, my personal philosophy was that if you can’t find me at home or work, it couldn’t be that important. Still, I purchased my 16-year-old a pay-as-you-go phone when she entered high school in 2009.

I put $25 worth of talking-minutes into her account for the next month of calls, and although we paid an additional $10 for unlimited text messages, the grounds for actual talking were simple: When she runs out of minutes, she’s done for the month. Beyond that, she isn’t allowed to text at church, dinner, some family functions and of course not while (learning to) drive. 

Recently, however, we put a twist in the communication chemistry when I got a cell phone of my own. We got rid of the home land line, I learned how to send text messages and even have a touch screen phone good for surfing the Web. Yes, this technically-challenged girl is pretty impressed with herself for now being able to communicate immediately with my 16-year-old, order a pizza from the parking lot at work and tell my parents what time I'll pick up the 9-year-old. 

The rules are still the same, and for the most part, they’re followed. Now, however, our 9-year-old wants a cell phone of her own. Not happening. There’s no need for this in our family and she'll get one when she enters high school. Her social life still is controlled by me anyway, and I always know when to drop her off and pick her up. If not, I can’t think of a time when there wouldn’t be a nearby phone to use.

So am I living in another era?  Who knows. But we can revisit and revise as needed.


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